Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

During our wedding, I want to honor mine and FH's grandparents who have passed.

This may sound like a stupid question but exactly where do you put the memorial candle? I was thinking of honoring them at the mass and having something in our reception room with their pics but in the same breathe, I also want to put our parents wedding pics up too who are still living. Do you think it is appropriate to put our relatives pics that have passed along with a memorial candle but also put our parents pics along with this stuff too? I kind of like the idea of showing our parents pics from their wedding.

Would you suggest doing a memorial candle at the church with all their names on it and at the reception use votive candles and place a poem by the pics instead of the memorial candle this way it doesn't look like it is dedicated just to the deceased as our living relatives pics will be there too?

Do people usually have the memorial candle at the mass and reception?

One more question, growing up I only knew my fathers parents as my mom's parents passed away before I was born. My grandmother on my fathers side is still living. I lost my grandfather suddenly in 1985 when I was 11 years old and I have never really gotten past it. I cannot express how much I miss my grandfather. Do you think it would be inappropriate to have a pic of him hanging from my bok? I know most girls do that with their parents.

If anyone can suggest or inform me of how the memorial candle is usually done (whether during the mass or reception) and please let me know if you think it is okay to have my grandfathers pic hanging from my bok or is that really just meant for parents.

Sorry this is so long.

TIA...

Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

I think we're putting my and FH's grandparent's wedding pics on our card table. We're not doing memorial candles per say, but we wanted to honor them in some way.

Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

i think this is def all up to you and your wishes. there is no "right" or "wrong way!" I am doing a memorial candle for my dad at the reception on one of the tables, bc I am getting married at my RH, but otherwise I may have done it at the church. I think you can really do either. And if you want, why dont you just do your parents wedding pics in one place and your memorial candle in another place at the reception, diff tables. Of course you dont have to do that though.

You also mentioned another option which i think is nice, which is memorial candle at mass and then votive and poem at reception.

And i def think its appropriate for you to use your grandfathers pic as a bo-k charm, you are not limited to just using that for anyone in particular, but for whoever is meaningful to you and what you would like. do whatever is going to make you feel good about it all!!

Message edited 5/30/2007 7:20:25 PM.

Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

My memorial candle (for my mom) will be set up on a small table under the chuppah and lit at the very beginning of the ceremony. It will then be moved into the reception roon to burn during the whole party. I would like to have it on my table. I don't think that there would be any other appropriate place.

I will put pictures of our parents on their wedding day on the card table. A pic of my mom is going on my bo-k as well.

There is no right or wrong way to do any of this. Whatever you want to do, no one can tell you to do otherwise.

Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

my father passed 3 years ago - so instead of a father daughter dance, my DJ is helping me put together a photo montage to music and it will be played on 50 inch plasmas. I think that in order to include everyone and make everyone feel comfortable, we are going to have the DJ make an announcement - "if you would like to honor someone close who you have lost, join us in lighting a memorial candle" or something to that effect, and we can pass out candles and anyone in the room who wants to, can light one

Message edited 5/31/2007 10:46:36 AM.

Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

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Posted by KarinAmanda

my father passed 3 years ago - so instead of a father daughter dance, my DJ is helping me put together a photo montage to music and it will be played on 50 inch plasmas. I think that in order to include everyone and make everyone feel comfortable, we are going to have the DJ make an announcement - "if you would like to honor someone close who you have lost, join us in lighting a memorial candle" or something to that effect, and we can pass out candles and anyone in the room who wants to, can light one

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Re: Question re: memorial candle or tribute table... (sorry so long)

Can anyone tell me where you found bo-k charms?